The most beautiful 17th birthday gift ever.

Hey Dad,
 
I love you this much,
And, i'm waiting on you, Do you love me too?




Looks like the waiting paid off,
looks like you love me too.

I'm still running from tomorrow.

You got me begging, begging.

Please don't go.

I don't know if you feel the way I do.

But, if you leave, I'm going to find you.

You weren't just another fish in the sea, to me.

We clutch, it isn't much but it's enough to make me wonder what's in store for us.

 All I know, is right here, and right now, I love you more then anything in the entire world.

But, oh course you won't listen anymore.

You could never see how much I fucking fought for you?

I tried to fucking prove it to you baby.

I tried my fucking best, to give you nothing but perfectness.

So fuck it, i'm leaving.

I'm done with your bullshit.

Have fun trying to find someone who actually give a damn, 

someone that'll put up with all you're scremo music crap,

someone who will make up stories for what happened to your hair,

someone who will put up with your fucking bullshit, and your non stop lies.

I hope you find someone who fucking makes you cry like i did,

Every damn night, I layed awake, tears on my pillow, trying to find a way to end this fucking fight.

But, I couldn't, cause I loved you,

I couldn't let you go,cause you were my fucking everything.

But, i've learnt something over the years.

EVERYONE LEAVES.

.

So You Better Hear Me Out This Much You Owe Me

I don't think he understands the sacrifices that I made
Maybe if this bitch had acted right, I would've stayed
But I've already wasted over half of my life,
I would've laid down and died for you,
I no longer cry for you,
No more pain bitch,
You took me for granted took my heart and ran it straight into the planet,
Into the dirt,
I can no longer stand it
Now my respect,
I demand it!
I'mma take control of this relationship
Command it, and i'mma be the boss of you now goddamnit!
And what I mean is that I will no longer let you control me!

You've Sure Got The Words To Explain The Explainable.

"What happened between us that night it always seems to trouble me 
Now all of a sudden these gossip brags wanna cover me
And you makin' it seem that it happened that way because of me
But I was curious and I'll never forget it baby
What an experience, you coulda been the one but it wasn't that serious
Their was smoke in the air before now its me clearin' it
That felt good, all and all I learned a lesson from it though
You never see it comin' you just get to see it go "

Here's A Secret Nobody Knew.

Congradulations "best friend", you ruined my life.

The Long Lost Phone Call

Hey,
It sure is nice to talk to you again.
How's life been treating you?
I heard you got a new girl?
She better be treating you right, 'cause you deserve someone amazing.
Don't let her make you unhappy okay? Please?
You deserve so much more then that.
You might have made mistakes with me,
and I might have made mistakes with you,
but the one thing we both deserve is to be happy.
It's hard to be happy, without you.
I mean, knowing my baby is rolling around with another girl, that's a little hard to bare.
But I'm trying.
I'm not afraid of living without you, I just don't like it.
I hate it actually.
But, if you're happy this way, so be it.
I just want you happy.

I'm sure we'll talk again soon.
but, goodbye for now.


ps. I love you.
                     -- forever and always

I Was Blinded.

You get blinded when you’re in love, I think that’s the big problem.

You get blinded by the sight of them. You go blind, so you don’t see the actions that are happening. You don’t watch because you think it’s impossible that things could unravel and perhaps take your loved one away.

You don’t notice when things fall apart because you’re so caught up in seeing the good in everything, but mostly you plead to see the good in them. If things start to get worse, you’ll start to see yourself changing. You’ll start to blame yourself for there actions, or words. Anything to make yourself believe there’s still something good in them. That’s when things get bad. At this point, you will believe anything they say. No matter if it’s a lie. You start to fight for them, you grab your amour and your weapons, and you head out onto the battlefield of love. You get beat. You’re black and blue. Cuts everywhere. You’re bleeding like crazy. Your lungs are crushed, it hurts to breathe. Your legs are aching, and your heart feels out of place. You lay down, and you stare into the sky.

The pain is starting to become overwhelming. 

You start to think “Where did it all wrong? I just didn’t, I couldn’t see this coming? Maybe this is my fault?” At this point, you just want  to head back home. You’re ready for the father to take you home. You don’t want to hurt anymore, you don’t want to keep crying out to the sky. You can’t do it without the person you love. Life just doesn’t make sense without them. It’s unliveable.

When you get to this point, you need to close your eyes, breathe and stand up.

You need to put on a brave face. You need to keep your head up high, please. For me?

You need to go get washed up, and bandage your heart. Just hold on. I know it’s going to hurt, cause I’ve been there. I didn’t want to keep going either. I didn’t know how to function without my baby. I didn’t know what to do. But I’m trying, and you need to try with me.

We need to put our sunglasses back on, and keep away from the sun.

We don’t want to get blinded again, do we?

Here's The Magic.

I don’t know,
 but
I think I, may be

Fallin’ for you

Everything That Means Anything At All, You Have.

I miss your smile,

       ... but I mostly miss mine.

Love Made Me Blind

There's another thing to learn about tears:
They can't make somebody who doesn't love you anymore love you again.